Sunday, June 20, 2010

I chose the road to...questions?!

I am so torn emotionally. I love Hong Kong. Truly and completely. There is nothing here that I want to leave, yet in 44 days I will be heading back stateside. I miss my family and friends back home in Alabama and cannot wait to see them, still I know that it is going to be miserably hard to leave here in a month and a half. I have totally made a home of Hong Kong and have seriously considered finding work here and making it permanent. But alas, I know that now is not the time and on August 3rd I will depart this adventure to find the next one in my life.

Recently work has been quite a smooth operation. I have grown completely confident in the cases that I handle. It has taken almost the entire 10 months to feel this way. I am able to assist a client, counsel and guide her, certain that I am giving her accurate information and advice. It is a very good feeling to have at last. From an emotional standpoint, however, the work has not gotten easier. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade my ministry for anyone else’s and am certain that God has put me exactly where He wants me. But some days I have to control the feelings of rage that build inside of me when yet another man rapes one of my clients. This month in particular seems to have been particularly difficult with an influx of rape cases. What is it that makes someone think they have the right to violate someone else? Why do some people think that women’s bodies are property or things that they can use and abuse and discard afterwards?

I have given this a lot of thought because I arrived at work one day recently to find that an already established client (and friend) of ours had been raped after going to her part time job. I was distraught on the inside and when I saw her I went to hug her and tell her that I was here if she needed to talk. I later became even more mentally upset because she said “oh Maegan, it’s okay, I’m alright”.

Okay?!?! Alright?!? This girl is brutally raped and she is alright? What kind of world do we live in where someone can be grossly violated but has to pick herself up, dust herself off, and keep moving. Pretending that nothing happened to her. Pretending that everything is okay. Continuing working and supporting her family with a smile on her face because she has no other choice. No time to cry. No time for therapy. No time to collect herself.

If this situation happened to one of my friends or family members today, their world would stop. People would react and action would be taken. But in the lives of so many women in the world, this happens everyday and they have to pretend like nothing has changed. Wipe away the tears, hide the pain, and keep pressing on. What kind of existence is that? What kind of world is this we live in?

I am haunted by the need to rescue these women from the predators in their lives. I am not confused however… I know this does not only take place in Asia. People exploit people everywhere. I just can’t comprehend why.

2 comments: